Movies That Suck

Here are some movies that suck.
And yes, I am spoiling.

Unbreakable – A very pompous movie. Bruce Willis is an amazing actor, and he was wasted on this waste of a movie. IF – and there will not be, but IF there was going to be a trilogy, this movie would have been good. There is not going to be a trilogy – watch the special features. The director decided to show the parts where a superhero discovers that he is a hero. The entire movie was spent brilliantly building suspense, and expectation. Our expectations were fulfilled by text. That is, rather than end the movie, a summary of what will happen ends the movie. Stupid, cop out ending. I don’t care how original and groundbreaking the movie was. It had a really bad ending.

Insomnia – This movie could have been good. The premise is interesting. The omniscient bad guy is very cool. However, the ending sucked. They kill each other. I can’t even remember what Williams’ character wanted from Pacino’s. I didn’t care. There was no closure. The characters I spent an entire movie getting connected to, empathizing with, worrying about were carelessly killed by a foolish director who wanted to impress the audience and be different. I say what a jerk.

One Hour Photo – Well crap, I can’t remember why this movie sucks. But it did, and the ending did it. I think it was that the main character – played by Robin Williams – was a disturbed but good guy who may have saved a marriage through his actions, but he is still probably going to jail. But they don’t tell us. We are left wondering what happens, with no way of knowing. It sucks.

Mystic River – It is obvious that Shamalan is a better director than Eastwood. However this movie still had the potential to be good. But then one friend kills another over a misunderstanding; later discovers that he was wrong, but goes on like nothing happened. Normally, in some movies, the plot is driven by the mistakes and misunderstandings of the characters. I dislike these movies – misunderstanding is too easy a way to create tension. A cop-out, if you will. But add to this a movie where the character you connect with and worry about the most is mistreated throughout the movie, culminating in his unfair murder, and the guy who did it gets away with it. It makes me so mad!! At the end there is this parade where all the main characters are watching, looking at each other. The killer looks at the third friend – who is a cop – and kind of shrugs. NOOO! You don’t torture the audience like that and then shrug it off. That is downright mean. You give retribution.

You see, the purpose of movies is entertainment. We go to them, or watch them to escape the normalcy, simplicity, boredom, etc of our normal lives. Only people with problems consider this entertaining: “A man is sexually abused and has his whole life messed up. There is a misunderstanding and he is accused of killing someone he did not kill. One of his friends decides to take matters into his own hands, tells him that if he confesses he won’t kill him. The poor man confesses to avoid death, and is shot anyway. Then even though they find proof that he didn’t kill the girl, there is no evidence and the darn traitor friend gets away with it. The end” What a horribly sadistic story. Might as well make a movie about killing puppies where the people who kill them become millionaires who abuse their wives and rape their own children. So entertaining. Geez.

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